You may not be aware of it, but the French get bad press abroad, in the sense that almost everyone hates us. And we’re not going to lie to each other, it’s deserved since we tend to make a fool of ourselves all the time, to give lessons to whoever wants to listen when we have a lot of faults, to not respect others , to believe that we are at home wherever we go and to sell arms to countries that are not the most respectful of human rights when we pride ourselves on being their most worthy representatives.
1. The history of participatory pixel art on Reddit
Recently a large participatory project was started on the Reddit site where people could create a pixel art work by placing a color pixel at the same time as other Internet users. French users created several nice works until streamers came and did anything (like a big French flag and a giant Eiffel tower) while ridiculing themselves to other users who still understood that the French were messing up everything.
2. When we created the Maginot line
When you make a defense system that you think is insurmountable and a few years later the name of this system becomes synonymous with “defense that you think is insurmountable but which is ineffective” you know you screwed up. Obviously it’s easy to continue to boast about it but honestly it was shit this system.
3. To the 2010 world cup with the story of the bus
A good part of the world had their eyes riveted on the competition and our players suddenly decided not to get out of the bus, like unhappy kids who suddenly have a tantrum. You can imagine that once again we went for idiots and people full of themselves, and all that in front of the whole world. Cock-a-doodle Doo.
4. When Gérald Darmanin criticized the UK over Ukrainian refugees
The same Gérald Darmanin who tore up the tents of migrants in Calais blasted the UK government with his holy word, ordering them to show humanity and welcome Ukrainian refugees. By reaching a new level of shame that is particularly distressing and appalling, Darmanin has obviously provoked a heartfelt response from the English government.
5. When we passed the nationals at 80km/h
When we spent a fortune to speed the roads to 80 km/h and finally reset the speed to 90 km/h just a few months later, the world didn’t look at us as geniuses. Thousands and thousands of euros literally thrown in the trash for absolutely nothing while we are constantly being told that there is no more money. It’s stupid.
6. When we define ourselves as the country of human rights
It is beautiful and virtuous to define itself as the country of human rights, but you still need to have the reasons to do so. Once I had claimed the title of the nicest man in the world, but I quickly realized that I was a big asshole and that there was much nicer than me. It’s exactly the same.
7. When it was said that the minitel was going to revolutionize the world
Do not spit on the thing either, but at one time we saw ourselves on top of the world thanks to our revolutionary invention which was going to put us on the front of the stage. Unfortunately barely seven years later the Internet arrived and the Minitel began to sink into oblivion. But it was a good try guys and it wasn’t so bad.
8. When we chose the rooster as our emblem
When deciding what was going to be the emblem of France, there is still someone who proposed the rooster. Rooster. The animal talks about it, lives in a barnyard where it shows off all day, it makes noise, pisses off the whole neighborhood, gets busted by almost all the other animals and is absolutely not friendly. And this is our symbol.
9. When we created Manuel Valls
We pass the hot potato with Spain to find out who created Manuel Valls and I like to tell you he was born in Barcelona, so it’s their fault. Logically they should have custody of it, but I don’t know why they gave it to us and we can’t get rid of it anymore. We probably deserve it.