I grant you, the weather is not a joke with the photos of the heat wave which are very scary and the proof that the summer of 2022 is the worst of all summers. But since I don’t really like seeing you put on sad faces and we still have (I hope) a little bit of time to spend together, I prefer that we spend it boring each other as much as we can. . And for that, we are lucky to be able to count on @chunkbardey, a twittos with a more than appreciable sarcastic humor. He and I want your best.
1. The world is so full of beautiful things that I will never see because they are not on the way home
2. The microwave says it’s 9:59 and the oven says it’s 10:01, that’s why communication is so important
3. In truth, I’m a pretty productive person, except when there’s the slightest noise or sound.
4. I’m against blaming the victims, except when someone loses their sunglasses in the ocean.
5. I want to be sooo rich one day, like I can rent a room
6. Walking. And from what I see, I’m not the only one
7. I don’t understand people who go out without a bag, what do you do if you come across an object that you want to take home??
8. I hate it when life sucks so much you have to start appreciating the simple pleasures, fuck my life
9. It must be so heartbreaking to make a mistake, my heart goes out to people who have faced this kind of thing before
10. I’m late and to make matters worse, I’m wearing an ugly outfit.
11. Sometimes you see someone riding a bike wearing a hat instead of a helmet and you’re like “God, so close.”
12. Filling out my tax return. I depend on myself, therefore a dependent. And since, in real life, I ask for a lot of care, that’s two people
13. I would love to eat a graham cracker, but unfortunately things are not that simple.
14. It’s funny how some people need encouragement to ask for help. Personally, at the slightest difficulty, I’m like “HELLO??? ANYBODY???”
15. Sometimes I’m like, “God, I wish I was in my bed right now,” and then I realize I’m actually in bed and I’m not quite sure what I want anymore.
Ah, they’re funny, these pranksters anyway! What would we do without them…