Top 10 reasons not to call your son Isaac, the worst first name on earth

Askip a colleague that we appreciate more than a lot has just had a cute kid and he would have called him Isaac. Like what even good people in all respects can make bad choices in life… We must immediately set up an awareness campaign so that you don’t make the same mistake and don’t offer your child a future as gloomy as a Renault 5 parked for a week under a nest of pigeons. Anyway, don’t call your son Isaac, for God’s sake.

1. The only diminutive of Isaac is “Isa”

The problem is that “Isa” is already the diminutive of Isabelle, and you don’t want your kid to be associated with the image of a human resources director who smells of coffee.

2. The most famous Isaac in the world, he is famous because he hit an apple on the face while he was taking a nap

In terms of big shame, that ranks very high.

3. It looks like a ZAAC, and a ZAAC is not cool

ZAAC (Corporal Accident Accumulation Zone): Section of road where there is an abnormally high number of bodily accidents.

It definitely fucks the female dog.

4. In Sex Education, Isaac is the worst character

It’s this selfish bastard who destroyed a love story between two beautiful people, all because he felt alone in his little mobile home. “Gngngn my life is difficult, I’m in a wheelchair, I’m sad” no, but how are you, Isaac? Playing on misery is not cool at all.

5. In Hebrew it means “he will laugh”

Ok and what is laughter for in life? To nothing. That’s not what will pay for our pensions if you want to know everything… If it’s to give birth to non-productive individuals, it’s better not to have children in fact.

6. It is the 7th most popular first name in Paris in 2021

Do you really want your child to be this kind of bobo who rides an electric scooter, Stan Smith on his feet and an electric cigarette in his mouth, listening to the latest Romeo Elvis in fashion? This kind of city dweller unable to differentiate a cow from a bale of straw? This kind of misfit who has his sushi delivered 7 times a week to eat in front of The Money Heist ? Think about it well.

7. 89% of Isaacs go bald before they reach 30

People laugh at their smooth skulls on the street and ask if they can cook eggs on them as soon as the outside temperature exceeds 28 degrees Celsius. Nobody wants that life.

8. It’s a male name only

Hello sexism… We are in 2022, it would be a question of opening up to new themes of society in fact…

9. Isaac rhymes with hypochondriac, ammonia and Aurillac

Only essentially negative things. Ah yes there’s also Ravaillac, the guy who killed Henri IV. Since when do we actually kill people? Isn’t that a bit of a lack of education? Or a lack of respect? No, but these Isaacs are not lacking in air.

10. We knew a guy, in his CM2 class there was an Isaac and he pissed on himself in class

You do with it what you want but in our opinion it is a bad omen.

Come on, find him a real first name like Rodolphe or Simeon, but forget about Isaac right away if you want happiness for your offspring.

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